Excerpt from A Personal Matter: A Comedy in One Act

Scene. - A breakfast-room, closed in. Double doors in flat, backed by interior, fireplace L., entrances R. and L., window R., breakfast-tab'e set with two chairs R. of C., arm-chair by fireplace, desk R. of D. in F.

Mr. T. (discovered standing back to fireplace). I wonder where the deuce those morning papers are! I never, somehow, get up especially early in the morning to get them, but that particular morning they are sure to be unusually late. I sometimes suspect the carrier of cherishing a tender regard for the housemaid in No. 23: even now he may be urging his suit in the lower porch. By Jove! it is cool of him, - devilish cool! (Hastily leaving fire, and examining coat-tails.) Gad! how hot that fire is! Upon my soul, I thought at first I was ablaze! Looking at watch.) Eight o'clock, and no paper yet! I wonder if it is beneath my dignity as a family man to punch that carriers head. I don't know that that would mend matters much, but I feel that I should derive the most exquisite satisfaction from the operation. (To easy-chair taking paper.) Here's that last night's paper again, continually obtruding itself upon me, and apparently glorying in its successors delinquency. (Sits.) Hallo! what's this!

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