A mysterious figure sneaks into the sculpture garden of Sarasota's Ringling Museum. Wielding a mallet and chisel, the man commits an unspeakable, but darkly comic crime before escaping with a bizarre trophy. Recently divorced, thirty-something Kathy King is hired by the museum to investigate the crime. Although her previous experience has involved insurance fraud, she jumps at the chance to establish herself in her new surroundings. She interrogates a series of outlandish suspects, including a "cracker" teenager, a movie-obsessed homeless man, an evangelical minister, and a gay basher. Romantic interest also comes her way in the form of her employers' shy representative and a more aggressive local policeman. Kathy's parents live in Sarasota as well, recent retirees who are adjusting to Florida living. They struggle to contend with the exotic flora and fauna, the extremes in climate, the influx of snowbirds, the conservative politics, the dangerous mix of drivers, and the conflict between cultured Sarasota and blue-collar Bradenton. Two of their neighbors pull them unwillingly into a rapidly escalating turf war that parallels the initial stages of the war with Iraq. Both plots intertwine in unpredictable ways, leading to laugh-out-loud confrontations and a surprise ending. It's not just another day in paradise!