The Top 10 Dating Essentials" isn't a book about how to manipulate potential partners into dating you, nor is it about social etiquette on a date. It's about knowing what's important to look for in a partner, what makes a relationship work, and what you need to be working on with yourself. After three books on couple's conflict resolution, and following up 2014's "Top 10 Marriage Essentials, " Paul Shaffer's "Dating Essentials" addresses what every dater should know about dating. The ten "essentials" details: . Knowing what healthy actually looks like . Moving past your own past . Understanding your partner's "type" . Recognizing manipulation . Mythologies of dating . Knowing what to judge . How to handle conflict . Knowing healthy boundaries . Respecting the time needed for relationship transitions . What true intimacy looks like